What Do You Think?

The least of my priorities is to ruin the moment.
Though, it was so good that I crave for another.

However, thoughts come crashing.
Will it ever be better than that beginning?

How do I keep this going?
Should I just keep it a one time thing forever?

A bliss, a serenity, an inner peace,
That will forever be etched in my memories.

For on that fateful night,
We shared ourselves and everything was better.

Soaring high I was then,
Though still careful enough as not to startle any tired eyes.

I need your help now.
Help me figure out, is this worth a second time?

Her Song

When, finally, I find her, this is the song I will sing. For now, uncertainty is still my foe.

Brand New Colony
by The Postal Service

I'll be the grapes fermented, bottled and
served with the table set in my finest suit
like a perfect gentleman.
I'll be the fire escape that's bolted to the
ancient brick where you will sit
and contemplate your day.

I'll be the waterwings that save you if you
start drowning in an open tab when your
judgement's on the brink.
I'll be the phonograph that plays your favorite
albums back as you're lying there, drifting off
to sleep... drifting off to sleep...
I'll be the platform shoes; undo what heredity's done to you:
you won't have to strain to look into my eyes.
I'll be your winter coat buttoned and zipped
straight to the throat with the collar up so
you won't catch a cold.

I want to take you far from the cynics in this town
and kiss you on the mouth.
We'll cut our bodies free from the tethers of
this scene, start a brand new colony.
Where everything will change, we'll give
ourselves new names. Identities erased.
The sun will heat the grounds, under our bare
feet in this brand new colony.
This Brand new colony...

Everything will change, Ooo ooo...
Everything will change, Ooo ooo...
Everything will change, Ooo ooo...

When I See You

Outside you'll see a happy face, but inside I'm already dying.

I know there's always a better place, but the hurt stops me from wanting.

For at night I sleep with a heavy heart, and don't even look forward to morning.

I should've known from the very start, that I shouldn't have kept on trying.

Outside you'll see a happy face, but deep inside I keep on dying.

No matter what anyone says, this lonely heart is mourning.

The first time I said a prayer in front of people in years.

We have this thing in the office where we'd huddle with our teams and talk about certain values. Today, it was my turn to lead. It was also the first time I took this sort of thing seriously. Now, after every huddle, our boss would ask for a volunteer to lead or say a prayer. I'd never volunteer in the past but I thought I'd step on to the plate since it was my turn anyway. It was pre-meditated, to say the least. I guess I really liked the value which was "Display Passion and Optimism." I've had a lack of passion and optimism lately so it really struck me.

Anyway, here is how my prayer went:

Dearest Lord,

Thank You for another day. It gives us the chance to better ourselves and be happy.

Lord God, Help unleash the Davids in us, who in battle, instead of sword and shield, carried You in his heart.

Help us to be ultimate team players who, though not stars of the show, cheer their teammates on until the final buzzer.

Help us be vessels of passion and optimism so that we may share ourselves with others.

Amen.

A Short Dissertation of a Dialogue or the Lack Thereof (First Draft)

Most of the time, grievances are caused by mere miscommunication. Person A thinks this while Person B thinks that. If one of them doesn’t get what they expected, that is called a misunderstanding. This is brought about either by having different plans, by a deviation from a set plan or probably the total absence of a plan. As much as possible, anyone would like to avoid such un-agreeable circumstances, which may lead to a gloomy atmosphere much worse, heart-rending endings.

A good way to avoid such miscommunications or misunderstandings is by expectation setting. In an event that involves two or more people, be it immense or minuscule in scale, expectations should be guided by the agreement of all parties involved with the intention that no one is given the short end of the stick. In other words, setting expectations is a shared, communal, mutual agreement between concerned participants of any events that, again, involves two or more people.

With this in mind, you, as well as the other people or parties involved, are better equipped to handle any unfavourable event, any misguiding or any obstacles at hand. With aligned expectations, the event is more tangible and will produce better results that are favourable to all parties involved. It allows for better resolution and a smoother execution of a said event. Much more, it does not allow for misguided opinions to be formed that may entail to negative judgements or statements that in the end may deem hurtful to all parties.

Now, in the occurence that an event already happens with the lack of expectation setting, the beauty of it all is that it is rarely irreconcilable or amendable. Communication is the key to damage control. Any person or party involved is usually open to reconciliation, understanding, settlement or compromise. It usually involves though that the person or party at fault oftentimes has to perform an action sympathetic or complimentary to the person or party faulted but, that’s besides the point. In any case, a dialogue, agreement, communication between two parties helps alleviate and control any hurt or cause of distress. It allows the other person or party to understand the basis and give own insight with regards to the matter at hand or the matter that has passed. It gives chance for a reconnect between two parties or persons. It may not bring back trust fully or right away but at least it settles any bad judgement and creates space to be civil and probably back on track.

In short, before an event takes place, it is best to set expectations through dialogue or communication so that everyone’s ideas and thoughts are aligned and fair. In any case that it is not done, an amicable way to settle this is again through communication wherein the faulted is made able to understand the other’s actions – It may not be what they would want to hear, but at least they’ll have a better understanding. If indeed all lines are severed, there is, at the very least, closure.

(to be continued...)

I'm A Box

Take out your new shoes from the box. Try them on, check the mirror, imagine yourself dancing around in them. What a joy...

Now, look at the box. The one that once held those shoes so dearly.

Oh, there I am! Empty.

I Thought

I thought we were having a "just friends" date.
I thought we were being honest to each other.

I thought we were not going to contemplate.
I thought we were just going to enjoy that time together.

But, despite the fact, I still like you.
Though your thoughts we're unfair, I'm not mad at you.

I will still do it again, just for you.
If you have no one to call, I'd be the first to answer you.

I thought I should take it slow.
I thought I shouldn't make a move.

I thought I should just go with the flow.
I thought I shouldn't like you.

I guess, like I always am, I'm wrong again.
I can't win in this game. I can't even bargain.

Ipagpalagay Na Lang Na Sana

Nang hindi ko nalalaman at hindi man napaghahandaan,
Ang pagsusubok na yo'y bigla na lang nagdaan.

Ang sa unang akala'y lakad lang ng dalawang magkaibigan,
para pala sa kaniya'y iba ang siyang kahulugan.

Isa na pala iyong paraan upang matingnan,
Na kung magbabago man ang una na niyang napagpasiyahan.

Parang wala nga naman talagang laban ang tulad kong walang kamuwang-muwang,
Na todo ang pag-aalalang huwag niyang akalaing binibigyan ko ng kahulugan.

Aaminin ko, tuwang-tuwa ako nang kaniya akong inanyayahan.
Ngunit hindi ko akalaing kasama lang pala yun sa kaniyang mga pinagplanuhan.

Pilit kong pinipigilan na huwag nang lagyan ng kahit anong kulay,
Siya naman kasi nagsabi sa akin na wala naman nang ibang maitataglay.

Kaya't ayun ako, bulag sa katotohanan,
Tuwang-tuwa lang sa pagkakataong pinagbigyan.

Napakaraming salita ang hindi ko na lang binanggit,
Sa pag-aalalang baka ang mga sandaling iyon ay hindi na muling maulit.

Baka kasi ikatakot niya nanamam at ikagalit.
Ayoko na kasi munang sarili ko sa kaniya'y ipilit.

Nakakatawa minsan kung paano ka puwedeng mapaglaruan ng mundo.
Dahil anumang gawin mo, sa huli, ikaw pa rin ang sadyang natatalo.

Minsan gusto kong ipagdasal na sana wala na lang akong puso,
Para hindi na lang ako masaktan ng mga pangyayaring tulad nito.

Kaso, sa kabilang dako, napapa-isip rin talaga ako,
Na kung hindi sa mga katulad niya, para san pang naging tao ako?

Ano pa nga naman ang buhay kung wala kang pagdaraanang mga ganitong yugto,
Kung saan parang inapak-apakan, pinagkaisahan ang kabaitan mo?

Pero sa kabila ng lahat, ako pa rin ay kaniyang napangiti.
Makasama lang siya, isang hiling niya lang, kahit ano aking ipagpapalit.

Ganun lang siguro ang mga tulad kong tanga kung umibig.
Nasampal na sa mukha, durog na ang puso, ngunit hindi makatanggi.

Masaya rin nga pala ako na hindi ako nagkamali.
Na sa unang tingin ko pa lang, alam kong utak niya'y matindi.

Hindi niya man ipahalata, nag-iisip na pala siya.
Parang isang heneral na hindi pa natatalo sa giyera.

Lugi rin siguro ako kasi mayroon akong nararamdaman
Kung kaya't napakadali niya akong puwedeng maisahan.

Puwede rin sigurong manhid lang talaga ako.
Puwede ring sa kaniyang biglang pagyaya ay nagulat ako.

Kung may hinahanap siya noong mga sandaling iyon,
Alam kong ni anung kislap, wala siyang matutunton.

Ngayon, heto nanaman ako, nadali ng maling akala.
Dapat pala hindi na ako nag-isip pa't tinodo na.

Subalit hindi, kaya ito na lang ngayon ang nasa palaisipan,
Kung tingin mong alam kong "date" yun, sa'yo ko pa kaya pababayaran?

Huli na 'to kasi ayoko na sanang pag-gugulan pa,
Maraming, maraming salamat sa pagkakataong madapa.

Na kung sa pagitan mo'y gusto mong kalimutan yung maiksing panahon na yun na nagdaan,
Sa akin nama'y habang buhay ko pasasalamatan at panghahawakan.

At Your Own Pace

I assure you now that I am in no rush.
Who wants to just dive into something unknown anyway?
I understand you once had your heart crushed,
And all the pain has not completely gone away.

I assure you, nobody comes in ready for love
It's the journey that somehow tells us that part.
It's as much your decision as it is mine
Telling you, I thought, was just the start.

Let's give this thing a try,
And be careless enough to give ourselves a chance.
As it would be unfair to just compare
When all you've had of me was a mere glance.

Now let's just go with the flow, if you'd agree.
I promise to you that I'll follow your pace.
So please rest your worries, dear.
We both know this is not a race.

Bago Ang Lahat

Bago ko pa man aminin sa iyo,
Kailangan ko munang aminin sa sarili ko.

Ang bawat salimuha't nararamdaman ko,
Ang lahat ng nais sambitin nitong puso.

Na ikaw ang siyang nasa isip,
Mula sa pag-gising hanggang sa panaginip.

Na pagbati mo ang siyang pinaka-aabangan,
Ano pa man ang aking pinagkaka-abalahan.

Na dahil sa'yo muling nagkaroon ng inspirasyon,
Magsulat ng mga salitang nagkaipon-ipon.

Na kung hindi ka sana nakilala,
Tuloy pa rin sana sa pagbabale-wala.

Na kung sa buhay ko'y hindi ka pa pumasok,
Hindi na muling mararamdaman ang pagtibok.